Updates for Axas

[Angelus]

Okay so there are a few things I wish to change about Axas. First things first, change the title of the profile thread to Axas if that's reasonable. Secondly for the actual profile edits. Posting the template in code that once all the edits are approved, this will just be copied and pasted over the old profile. I'll then post the profile in a second post with all edits highlighted for easy viewing. Should be noted that all of the Asa names are now replaced with Axas. It should also be noted that I combined the two weak Blank slots for a moderate blank slot, and used my pp to upgrade the Blue Magic ability to moderate. Also got rid of the teleport ability due to problems that arose from it.

Here is the profile link

[blockquote][size=1][center][i]Let’s get the basics down first.[/i][/center]

[b]Name[/b]: Axas
[b]Nicknames[/b]: Larcenous Amnesiac, Number XII, The Forgetful Fool
[b]Age[/b]: 19
[b]Gender[/b]: Male
[b]Race[/b]: Nobody
[b]Homeworld[/b]: Twilight Town | TWTNW
[b]Alliance[/b]: Shadow

[center][i]You’re just a puppet aren’t you?[/i][/center]
[b]Played By[/b]: angelus
[b]Age[/b]: 18
[b]Gender[/b]: male
[b]Contact[/b]: PM
[b]Audition Link[/b]:
[b]Other[/b]:
[center][i]So tell me a little bit about yourself.[/i][/center]

[b]Physical Aspects[/b]: Axas stands at six feet exactly in height, and has a slender yet somewhat muscular build. He has fair white skin, and medium length, black, spikey hair (think kh2 riku for spikey appearance). His eyes are different than one might expect, being a light grey, almost silverish in color, and having an almond shape to them. His ears and nose aren't anything special, so aside from his eyes, there is only one oddity on his face. And that is a small scar just above his left eyebrow. He has little in the way of facial hair, having only a small soul patch.

For clothing he now wears the uniform of the group he belongs to, Organization XIII. This consits of a black cloack, black pants, a black undershirt, black gloves, and black boots. Most of this is made out of what appears to be leather, or a leather-like material.

[b]Persona[/b]: [ul][li][u]Façade:[/u] Axas isn't exactly what one would call the most sophisticated Nobody. He's blunt, to the point, and he only hides what he's thinking if it could cost him some great blackmail material. He's no longer acting like an idiot, and instead has let his true analytical side come to the surface. While not nearly as smart as Vexen, he is smart in terms of lateral thinking. He uses sarcasm from time to time, but only on occassion. He has chosen to keep name calling in his repertoire, though he has gotten rid of the childish impersinations, and the flinching and cowardly pleas.

Calm and collected, Axas isn't the type to anger easily, nor is he easily amused. He speaks less often than he used to, though when he does he speaks words worth heeding, at least from his perspective. He prefers a more direct approach to things than mind games, yet at the same time he knows the value of such a thing and uses them if he feels he needs to.

[/li][li][u]Inner Mind:[/u] A being without a heart, he cannot feel emotion, thus rendering any form of compassion, hate, or sadness a lie. Cold, cruel, and calculating, when it comes down to a fight the gloves are off. He's the type of guy who saves conserves his strength and powers so that he can get an idea of what he's up against, and at least start formulating a way to beat his opponent. For the first few minutes of a fight he will most likely do nothing but just dodge and block attacks. Though don't be surprised if he takes a hit or two on purpose. A cunning warrior, he'll use his enemies physical and psychological weaknesses against them, and he may even pretend to be severely injured or that he's surrendering to lure them in close for a sneak attack.[/li][/ul]

[center][i]Empty your pockets and show me what you got[/i][/center]

[b]Items[/b]: (List any items you wish to purchase)
[ul]
[li]
[/li][li]
[/li][li]
[/li][/ul]

[b]Inventory[/b]: Any items such as keychains, and Synthesis materials, as well as plot items go here.
[ul]
[li]
[/li][li]
[/li][li]
[/li][/ul]
[center][i]Stand up and fight.[/i][/center]

[b]Weapon(s)[/b]: Desolation- A large flail. It is black and white, with both the handle looking like the middle part of the Nobody symbol and the spikes looking like the tip of it. The spiked part of the flail is attached to the handle via chain that can extend or retract as Axas sees fit. The chain can go up to fifteen feet.

[b]ABILITIES SECTION[/b]:

[Blue Magic]
This ability allows its master to learn any ability used against him. He cannot learn any ability at a strength higher than this ability. The ability does not have to hit him, and in the case of a defensive ability, he merely has to attack while it's in effect. In order to learn a new ability he must have a slot available to accomodate it, and if he does not, he must replace one ability with the one he wishes to learn. If he does this, then he has to relearn the old ability.

Range: N/A
Speed: N/A
Cooldown: N/A
Uses: N/A
Strength: Moderate

[Blank Slate]
Simply an empty slot for a copied ability to go.

Range:
Speed:
Cooldown:
Uses:
Strength: Weak

[Blank Slate]
Simply an empty slot for a copied ability to go.

Range:
Speed:
Cooldown:
Uses:
Strength: Weak

[center][i]Everybody’s got a weakness or two; what are yours?[/i][/center]

[b]Elemental Weakness[/b]: Light
[b]Other Weaknesses[/b]: Unknown at the moment

[center][i]What’s your story?[/i][/center]

A Nobody that can't seem to remember his past at all, Axas is something of an enigma. He was originally born in Wonderland, one of the few humans to exist there. He was a prankster, though his pranks had a way of backfiring on him. He was quickly made into something of the world's jester, being forced to perform against his will. His performances were legendary. He'd set up some elaborate prank, and it would always end up biting him in the butt. And sometimes that was a literal thing.

Then one day as he was out and about he came across a black creature with beady yellow eyes. Being the type of guy he was, Axas took a stick, and poked it in the eye. It then proceeded to attempt to steal his heart. Realizing that this creature was dangerous, he decided to take it and use it on those who had ever done him wrong. He'd gotten quite far down the list when those under his control turned on him, turning him into the very things they were, Heartless. His empty body then became the Nobody he is today. Since his time as a Nobody he's avoided local residents of any place he goes to that hates his kind, his own kind, Heartless, and even the occasional Keyblade wielder or two that he may or may not have come across. He couldn't say if he had or not, as it appears that he suffers from short term memory loss as well. Why this is, well he has no idea. Perhaps it was something from his time as a human that carried over to his Nobody self. Due to recent events he's changed his fake personality. And depending on how future events turn out, he may change it again.

[center][i]It all comes down to this: make your choice.[/i][/center]

You are presented with three weapons: a sword, a staff, and a shield. The sword represents the power of the warrior; invincible courage comes with this weapon as well as horrible destruction. The staff represents the power of the mystic; inner strength comes with this weapon as well as wonder and ruin. The shield represents the power of the guardian; kindness to aid friends comes with this weapon as well as a shield that will repel all.

Which one will you choose?

[b]Chosen Weapon[/b]: Sword

[b]Guard Break[/b]
The ability to slash through any defensive abilities of Weak strength, Guard Break symbolizes the destructive power of the Sword at its peak.

Range: Melee
Speed: Normal swing speed
Cooldown: 3 posts
Uses: 2
Strength: Weak[/blockquote][/size]

[Angelus]

Let’s get the basics down first.

Name: Axas
Nicknames: Larcenous Amnesiac, Number XII, The Forgetful Fool
Age: 19
Gender: Male
Race: Nobody
Homeworld: Twilight Town | TWTNW
Alliance: Shadow

You’re just a puppet aren’t you?

Played By: angelus
Age: 18
Gender: male
Contact: PM
Audition Link:
Other:

So tell me a little bit about yourself.

Physical Aspects: Axas stands at six feet exactly in height, and has a slender yet somewhat muscular build. He has fair white skin, and medium length, black, spikey hair (think kh2 riku for spikey appearance). His eyes are different than one might expect, being a light grey, almost silverish in color, and having an almond shape to them. His ears and nose aren't anything special, so aside from his eyes, there is only one oddity on his face. And that is a small scar just above his left eyebrow. He has little in the way of facial hair, having only a small soul patch.

For clothing he now wears the uniform of the group he belongs to, Organization XIII. This consits of a black cloack, black pants, a black undershirt, black gloves, and black boots. Most of this is made out of what appears to be leather, or a leather-like material.

Persona:

• Façade: Axas isn't exactly what one would call the most sophisticated Nobody. He's blunt, to the point, and he only hides what he's thinking if it could cost him some great blackmail material. He's no longer acting like an idiot, and instead has let his true analytical side come to the surface. While not nearly as smart as Vexen, he is smart in terms of lateral thinking. He uses sarcasm from time to time, but only on occassion. He has chosen to keep name calling in his repertoire, though he has gotten rid of the childish impersinations, and the flinching and cowardly pleas.
  
  Calm and collected, Axas isn't the type to anger easily, nor is he easily amused. He speaks less often than he used to, though when he does he speaks words worth heeding, at least from his perspective. He prefers a more direct approach to things than mind games, yet at the same time he knows the value of such a thing and uses them if he feels he needs to.
  
  
• Inner Mind: A being without a heart, he cannot feel emotion, thus rendering any form of compassion, hate, or sadness a lie. Cold, cruel, and calculating, when it comes down to a fight the gloves are off. He's the type of guy who saves conserves his strength and powers so that he can get an idea of what he's up against, and at least start formulating a way to beat his opponent. For the first few minutes of a fight he will most likely do nothing but just dodge and block attacks. Though don't be surprised if he takes a hit or two on purpose. A cunning warrior, he'll use his enemies physical and psychological weaknesses against them, and he may even pretend to be severely injured or that he's surrendering to lure them in close for a sneak attack.

Empty your pockets and show me what you got

Items: (List any items you wish to purchase)

• 
  
• 
  
• 
  

Inventory: Any items such as keychains, and Synthesis materials, as well as plot items go here.

• 
  
• 
  
• 
  

Stand up and fight.

Weapon(s): Desolation- A large flail. It is black and white, with both the handle looking like the middle part of the Nobody symbol and the spikes looking like the tip of it. The spiked part of the flail is attached to the handle via chain that can extend or retract as Axas sees fit. The chain can go up to fifteen feet.

ABILITIES SECTION:

[Blue Magic]
This ability allows its master to learn any ability used against him. He cannot learn any ability at a strength higher than this ability. The ability does not have to hit him, and in the case of a defensive ability, he merely has to attack while it's in effect. In order to learn a new ability he must have a slot available to accomodate it, and if he does not, he must replace one ability with the one he wishes to learn. If he does this, then he has to relearn the old ability.

Range: N/A
Speed: N/A
Cooldown: N/A
Uses: N/A
Strength: Moderate

[Blank Slate]
Simply an empty slot for a copied ability to go.

Range:
Speed:
Cooldown:
Uses:
Strength: Weak

[Blank Slate]
Simply an empty slot for a copied ability to go.

Range:
Speed:
Cooldown:
Uses:
Strength: Weak

Everybody’s got a weakness or two; what are yours?

Elemental Weakness: Light
Other Weaknesses: Unknown at the moment

What’s your story?

A Nobody that can't seem to remember his past at all, Axas is something of an enigma. He was originally born in Wonderland, one of the few humans to exist there. He was a prankster, though his pranks had a way of backfiring on him. He was quickly made into something of the world's jester, being forced to perform against his will. His performances were legendary. He'd set up some elaborate prank, and it would always end up biting him in the butt. And sometimes that was a literal thing.

Then one day as he was out and about he came across a black creature with beady yellow eyes. Being the type of guy he was, Axas took a stick, and poked it in the eye. It then proceeded to attempt to steal his heart. Realizing that this creature was dangerous, he decided to take it and use it on those who had ever done him wrong. He'd gotten quite far down the list when those under his control turned on him, turning him into the very things they were, Heartless. His empty body then became the Nobody he is today. Since his time as a Nobody he's avoided local residents of any place he goes to that hates his kind, his own kind, Heartless, and even the occasional Keyblade wielder or two that he may or may not have come across. He couldn't say if he had or not, as it appears that he suffers from short term memory loss as well. Why this is, well he has no idea. Perhaps it was something from his time as a human that carried over to his Nobody self. Due to recent events he's changed his fake personality. And depending on how future events turn out, he may change it again.

It all comes down to this: make your choice.

You are presented with three weapons: a sword, a staff, and a shield. The sword represents the power of the warrior; invincible courage comes with this weapon as well as horrible destruction. The staff represents the power of the mystic; inner strength comes with this weapon as well as wonder and ruin. The shield represents the power of the guardian; kindness to aid friends comes with this weapon as well as a shield that will repel all.

Which one will you choose?

Chosen Weapon: Sword

Guard Break
The ability to slash through any defensive abilities of Weak strength, Guard Break symbolizes the destructive power of the Sword at its peak.

Range: Melee
Speed: Normal swing speed
Cooldown: 3 posts
Uses: 2
Strength: Weak

[/size]

[Lagunamov]

Ok, where do I start...

First, the personality change, while additions due to new experience are welcome, here went in a tangent down a hyperbole and became something entirely different. I know Nobodies don't have emotions and all, and can be manipulative with what they show, but they DO tend to show a relatively same personality as their Somebodies. They can only act the part they knew, or don't act at all and remain emotionless bastards like Xemnas and Saïx.
The part about seeing through hidden meanings and riddles seems to come a bit from the left field as well, and could lead into metagaming very easily.

I like that you changed Blue Magic into something that can't be abused by removing the "anything he sees" clause. But it was a Weak ability according to the old profile. In fact, there were three week slots. You put two moderate ones. That needs to be fixed.

[Angelus]

Alright, I'll work on the personality some more when I get the chance, which should be later today.

Also, I upgraded Blue Magic to moderate using my PP. So that's why it is now stated as Moderate, and not as weak. I also combined the two weak ability slots I had left over to a moderate one, so that I wouldn't have to go and change it from two weak ability slots to a copied moderate slot later.

There shouldn't be any issue with my upgrading Blue magic here since there was no purchase made, and I see no issue in making the two weak ones moderate, since the Abilities and classes thread does say that characters do get to start out with three weak, one strong, or one moderate and one weak. I'm essentially just saying I want to do the last one, except that I'm also upgrading the weak one with my free upgrade. If there is an issue with that, then let me know.

[Lagunamov]

Sorry, I missed the upgrade. But, you cannot combine two weak slots into a moderate one, especially if they are the starting slots. If you want a moderate slot, you have to upgrade one of them.

[Angelus]

Alrighty then, I'll make the required edits later today if possible. I have class to go to in about an hour and I still have homework I need to do.

[Angelus]

Double post I know, but I figured this would be the best way to say that hopefully this is better now.

[Lagunamov]

You know the drill.

Closed~