Glass to the Arson [Jericho]

[Slash]

It looked at her when she spoke. The spider was capable of understanding speech and speaking itself, but it was not sure of what to say. That name sounded familiar, though, and one word rose to its mind as a suitable reply.

"Nadia," it said in a voice that was only half Jericho's.

The aura receded, grew smaller, and eventually dissipated into thin air. Slowly, his gray skin turned to its regular color, and his eyes returned to normal. The limbs became insubstantial, ghostly, and faded into the air.

Jericho took a deep breath. He was exhausted, and only had a vague idea of what he'd done.

He took a look outside. Yeah, that seemed about right. Man, but there were a lot of bodies out there. And he had killed them all?

If it wasn't for Nadia being right there, he'd have laughed. As it stood, he just closed his eyes and tried to regulate his breathing.

[Aerith]

Sorry, I'm having trouble with words right now.
--------

It spoke to her. Just one word. Her name. Somewhere in there, she heard Jericho. But there was something else, too. Something or someone, she couldn't tell.

He reverted back to a much more palatable appearance. And said nothing. He only looked outside, took note of the carnage he had wrought, and closed his eyes. Nothing else. It was up to her to say something, it seemed.

"...Who are you? I mean, what...? Who was...? What was...?"

She needed air. There were bodies in here, too. Making sure to give him a wide berth, Nadia slipped outside and just stood in the rain, trying to calm her racing pulse.

[Slash]

Can't say I didn't expect that.

[/center]

He sat back. The rain was still going, but the thunder had become sparse. He could be heard from where she was.

"To answer your questions in order; Alan Jericho, questionably human, it doesn't have a name but I call it the spider, and I'm not entirely sure."

What a mess he had gotten himself into. How did one explain something like this? She'd leave, and he'd have to let her.

"It's...I don't know what it is. I wasn't entirely sure what would happen when I let it out, either. I can tell you what I know, but I don't know much..." He sprang into a more upright sitting position as soon as he thought of something. "It didn't attack you, did it?"

[Aerith]

The rain is nice.
--------

Alan.

Jericho wasn't his first name. For some reason, this new knowledge calmed her a notch or two more. Perhaps because it made him seem more human and less like that spider.

"No." She raised her voice enough to be heard over the rain. "No, it didn't."

How odd to refer to him and what he had become as two separate entities. Were they truly separate?

"It killed the entire mob. And then it came into the shack. But it just looked at me."

She folded her arms around her stomach and closed her eyes. By now, she was thoroughly soaked, but it felt good. If only she could more fully appreciate standing this long in a torrential downpour for the first time in her life.

"And it said my name."

[Slash]

Damage control?

Good. So it won't hurt her. Or I won't hurt her. I don't know. The line is so blurred it's confusing.[/color]

He took a deep breath. "Okay, then." Jericho sighed and tried to compile as much information as he could.

"As I said, I can't tell you much. It's not me, exactly, but it's not seperate enough to have its own thoughts or its own mind. I don't understand it, and I didn't know specifically that it existed, I only had an idea that there was something there." That had been back with Clive if he remembered correctly.

"It can't take control on its own, I know that much."

[Aerith]

Nothing is ever certain. Is it?
--------

Nadia opened her eyes, but did not say anything for a long while. He said he knew next to nothing about the spider. But it could not take over whenever it felt like it. Somehow, that wasn't very reassuring.

Finally, she spoke again. Her back was still to the doorway. "How do you know it won't take control on its own one day?"

Her other question, though, was more selfish in nature. "And why... why didn't it attack me?" For something that seemed to kill purely on instinct and with such ferocity, not killing her was odd. "What if it doesn't always decide not to attack me?"

[Slash]

Interesting questions.

[/center]

Jericho thought about it. Would it take over one day? Well...

Not of its own accord. It would not seek to displace him. It wasn't some alter ego that he could speak to or fight against. It was...

All of a sudden, he had a better grasp on what it was.

That is the last step. That is what I would be if, in my disgust for humanity, I relinquished my own humanity- not just in a mental but also a physical sense.[/color]

Would it hurt Nadia? No, it wouldn't, at least not intentionally.

"It won't. I know this. It doesn't have a will of its own, so it can't unless I let it. And it didn't attack you because...well, it's still got a part of me inside of it, and it probably recognized you enough to not attack. So as long as I don't get stricken with amnesia, it's not going to hurt you."

[Aerith]

Give me a little while. I may or may not be back.
--------

Nadia's eyes wandered over her surroundings, as though better answers awaited her somewhere out in the wet darkness. The images were still too fresh in her mind, and her stomach flipped once as they rose again.

She was torn on what to do. A part of her refused to stay with him any longer, no matter how many assurances he gave her. Something else could be figured out, some other way of life. But how to go about that all on her own was a daunting thought. She knew no one else. And she couldn't return to her home to try starting over.

Right now, he was all she had.

Dull pain throbbed in her temples, and she held her head for a moment. Too much stress. She couldn't think like this.

"I... I need to think. Alone." It was still raining, and she doubted he would move from here until it stopped. Even if he did, she would just go back to the ship and wait for him there. If she decided to return at all.

Without saying anything else to Jericho, she walked away from the shack. She walked until she had to stop. As she leaned against the side of a building, all the emotion she had tried so hard to hold back suddenly welled up.

Something was wrong with her. Why did she feel so convoluted on the inside?

She pressed her cheek against the drenched wood of the wall and allowed herself to weep.

[Slash]

Is that all, then?

[/center]

Jericho took a shaky breath. Nadia was gone? Yes, Nadia was gone. Well.

He turned his eyes upward. Storms are horrible omens for me, aren't they? I should have stayed in the ship.[/color] He smiled for a second, then wondered what to do next.

Everything gone, again? Really? How easily everything had fallen apart. The structure he had built had been made of glass, and one stray stone had sent it crashing around his ears.

Alone. He was alone. It wouldn't have bothered him so much if several days hadn't passed, enough for him to become used to company.

Part of him was enraged by the fact that he had saved her and she repaid him by leaving, but the greater part of him resigned itself to her loss. He didn't feel sad, really- his despair was too vast for that. That was the end of everything. He did not think he could find another candidate as suitable as she had been.

"Good-bye, Nadia," he said softly, and closed his eyes. He was tired and broken, and all that was left to do at this moment was entomb himself in his own mind for as long as he could.

Jericho drifted silently, completely unaware of anything around him.

Maybe he could actually find the spider. If it didn't have a voice, he could give it one. Hadn't he done the same back when he gave up Clive? He didn't know that it was a spider back then, but such changes would be minor.

Ha. I've discovered the ultimate cure to loneliness- you need not suffer it, if only you can manage to push yourself into paranoid schizophrenia.[/color]

[Aerith]

I don't know if I'm the best person to be asking for directions.
--------
[An Important Person by Motoi Sakuraba]

It turned out that she had lied to Jericho. She was doing absolutely no thinking at all, just spilling her feelings to the stoic silence of that wall. Amounting to little more than a confused mess of tears, the episode was masked by the rain, which meant she did not draw any attention to herself.

Or so she thought.

"Momma! Momma!"

The squishing of mud announced the appearance of a little girl, perhaps no more than five, stumbling barefoot through the storm. Both the girl's dress and face were streaked with mud, and her blond hair was a wet, tangled monstrosity that was plastered to her head.

The girl had noticed Nadia and was heading straight for her.

Before a single word of protest could be uttered, the girl had latched onto Nadia's leg. "Where's my house? Please help me. Please!"

She squeezed hard, which prompted Nadia to gently pull her off. Kneeling down so she could better look at the girl, she asked, "What are you doing out here?"

The girl practically lunged for her, wrapping her little arms around Nadia's neck and burying her face in her shoulder for a moment. She spoke, but her words were muffled, so she pulled back and tried again. "I'm Gabby, short for Gabriella." She tilted her chin up at this declaration, but then quickly resumed her frightened demeanor. "Momma and Daddy made me mad! So, I ran away from home. But then it started raining, and there was thunder, too! And lightning! I got lost. I'm still lost! I was fine... until I heard noises."

Gabby leaned against Nadia again. "I heard a lot of people. They sounded really angry. I don't know where they were going or what they were going to do. They were far away, so I didn't worry about them. But then I heard the noises, louder than the rain and the thunder and the lightning. They were scary noises."

Realization dawned on Nadia, and the turmoil surrounding her heart clamped down and squeezed, much as Gabby was clinging to her now. She had heard Jericho. No. The spider.

It was an effort for her to speak. "Did you see anything?"

Gabby shook her head and leaned back again, looking like she wanted to say something. But she grew quiet for a moment while she examined Nadia's face. "Why are you crying? Are you sad? Why?"

The relief that Nadia felt upon hearing that Gabby had not personally witnessed the slaughter was compounded when the girl reached out a small hand and touched Nadia's cheek.

"You're not lost, too, are you?"

The question, spoken so innocently, hit her like a ton of bricks.

You have no idea.

Nadia shook her head and tried to put on a smile. "Come on." She stood and took Gabby's hand. "Where do you live? What does your house look like?"

Gabby didn't hesitate. "I live in the mansion! I'm a princess! Well... no, I'm not. But my momma and daddy work there, and they have some rooms all to themselves. But everything's so dark. I don't know how to get back. I don't wanna be out here anymore. I'm sorry I ran away, and I wanna be home again."

Nadia gave Gabby's hand a reassuring squeeze. "I'll help you. Just stay with me."

She remembered seeing something resembling a mansion off in the distance, so she headed in that direction with Gabby in tow.

[Slash]

Silence.

[/center]

Darkness. That was all there was. Darkness and the soft pattering of the rain. That was all, and that was all that needed to be.

It was almost like sleeping. Almost. Eventually he'd wake up, and everything that had happened could be put behind him. It would be nothing more than the faintest memory of a dream upon waking.

Or he could go insane. That was always an option. There was a sort of comfort in mindlessness that he could appreciate. The spider would appreciate it, as well.

He could become the spider- or perhaps he could kill without its power, until he was killed?

So many options. Jericho considered them all with an impartial eye.

[Aerith]

I just can't stay away.
--------

Gabby was much more talkative now that she had someone with her. She and Nadia wound through the deserted streets. It seemed a combination of the storm and the rumors of a monster nearby had driven everyone indoors. All the better for this little walk through the town.

“What's your name?” Gabby looked up at her curiously.

She didn't answer at first. It wasn't important that Gabby know her name. They would probably never see each other again after this. There was no need to make this connection.

“My name is Nadia.” She kept her eyes on the path ahead.

“Nadia...” Gabby tested out the name, then looked up at her again. “You look different. I've never seen anybody like you before.”

Her stomach tightened. A flicker of fear and hatred rose all the way up to her throat. Here came the part when Gabby realized she shouldn't be associating with someone like her. The girl might start crying, maybe pull away and run off in disgust. Maybe even throw some harsh words at her, too.

But no. Gabby walked closer to her, and when she looked up at Nadia again, she was smiling.

“I think you're pretty. Momma says I'll be pretty when I grow up. I hope I grow up to be like you.”

No. No, you don't.

Words caught in Nadia's throat, but she was spared having to respond. They had arrived at the gates of the mansion. Gabby let go of Nadia's hand and turned to her. As best she could in a sopping dress, she curtsied. “Thank you, Miss Nadia.” She straightened, then grinned. “I just have to climb over the gate now.”

“Gabby, wait.” Nadia knelt down in the mud and drew the girl close to her so she could look her fully in the eyes. “Can you do me a favor?”

Gabby nodded fervently.

“Stay inside tonight. It's not safe out here.”

Gabby grew serious and leaned in closer, as though sharing a secret. “You mean the scary noises?”

Nadia nodded once. “Yes, Gabby. You need to stay far away from the scary noises.”

“Okay. I'll stay inside, even if Momma and Daddy make me mad again.” She gave Nadia one more hug and scampered over to the gate, scaling it with surprising ease and tumbling over to the other side. She started to run up the path to the mansion, but she turned around, seemingly remembering something, and spoke to Nadia through the bars of the gate. “Miss Nadia! You stay far away from the scary noises, too!”

Nadia hesitated for only a moment. “I will,” she lied.

Satisfied, Gabby waved and darted up to the mansion. Nadia watched her until the rain hid her from sight.

They aren't as scary if you know they aren't coming for you.

She looked in the general direction of the shack. No matter what he had become, Jericho had saved her life. Returning went beyond the mere thought that she owed him for that, though. She felt bound to him. They had held conversations she had never had with anyone else. It was the deepest connection she had ever had.

And she would rather not be stuck on this world.

She walked all the way back to the shack and stopped a few feet from the doorway. At this point, rainwater was most likely seeping directly into her skin. She probably looked as bedraggled as she felt.

“I believe you!” She shouted above the rain, trying to keep her voice steady. “If you say you won't hurt me, then I believe you!”

[Slash]

I think I'll- Oh hey.

[/center]

Mmf. Who was that? He stirred. That noise was annoying. Why did it sound so famil-

Nadia. Jericho's eyes shot open as he crashed straight back into reality.

She was back? What? No, she wasn't. He was hearing things. He had just gone so completely over the bend that he hadn't noticed. There was no way that she had come back.

He stood up and looked outside. No. She was there. Or was she? Was he seeing things, too? Yes. He concluded that she was.

Jericho stood in the doorway. The rain had lightened up enough so that he didn't have to yell.

If she was just a hallucination, then he still wanted to say a few things. Give himself some internal closure.

"I'm so sorry, Nadia," he said in the voice of a broken man. "I'm sorry for what I am and what I did. I know that doesn't change anything or make anything better, but I still had to say it."

Would she disappear now? Would he see her run away, or would she just vanish? He wasn't experienced with hallucinations.

[Aerith]

Just a couple of broken people.
--------

For a second, she thought she might be mistaken. Maybe he wasn't here anymore. Maybe he had left this world entirely. The thought made fear claw at her mind.

He appeared in the doorway and stared at her for the longest time. When he spoke, her heart just about broke. Even when he had told her about his past, he hadn't sound like that at all.

He sounded more human to her than he ever had before.

Slowly, she approached him, trying to keep her emotions as in check as possible. With the way he was standing in the doorway, she couldn't enter the shack itself, so she stopped right in front of him. Her eyes searched his face, but she said nothing.

Her hand rose halfway to his face, hesitated, then completed the journey as her fingers brushed against his cheek. Just a brief moment of contact, then her hand returned to her side.

"Whatever you are... you saved me. I don't think a total monster would have done that."

[Slash]

So I'm not completely insane yet.

[/center]

Jericho wished that she wouldn't approach. Of course, it made sense that if he snapped, he would mock himself as cruelly as he had others. She reached towards him, and he knew what would happen- her hand would never reach him, or it would just pass through him, as insubstantial as smoke.

Then her fingers touched- actually touched his cheek. She was real, then?

Yes. She was real. His first instinct was to heave a large sigh of relief, and his second was to cling to her like a drowning man to ensure that she did exist, that she was actually here.

Of course, he suppressed both.

"I deserve the title of monster," he replied. "Much more than you ever have, at least. I'd never hurt you. That is true. But what will you do, Nadia? This is your choice. I can leave you here, or take you somewhere else and leave you there, or perhaps something else. I won't force you to stay with me. What do you want?"