Dying Ambitions [Nadia, Aerith, Clive]

[Aerith]

I've never been much for jewelry.
--------

Nadia said nothing while Clive spoke. She said nothing when he showed her his scars. She said nothing when he put the necklace around her neck. And she said nothing even after he went upstairs.

The silver cross was cold against her skin. She wanted to take it off. If it had belonged to Clive's daughter, she was unworthy to wear it. With every passing second that it stayed around her neck, she was only sullying it. But she was exhausted emotionally, mentally, and physically, so she made no move to remove it.

Another wave of apathy hit her. Clive had said those things to keep her from becoming like Jericho. A monster, he had called him. No more monstrous than most others she had met. At least he was honest about it.

What's so wrong with becoming like Jericho? He doesn't care what anyone thinks of him. If only I could be that way...

But what if there was some truth to Clive's assertion that good did exist somewhere? If it did, it must be incredibly difficult to find. The difference between Clive's experience of humanity's betrayal and hers was that her own family had turned on her. Certainly, his wounds were deep in their own right, but nothing could match the feelings associated with seeing your own mother ready to kill you.

And Aerith acts so far above the rest of humankind. She probably is not even human. If that is the only exception Clive can find... that doesn't leave me with much, if any, hope.

She just stared at the ceiling for a while, swimming through her tangled thoughts.

[Slash]

A short walk.

[/center]

You don't have to thank me. It is thanks enough to have you around.

He walked around for a while, the spider on his shoulder an oddly comforting presence. However, he needed to get back. What if Nadia woke up?

When he came back into the house, he found that she was up. Well, that was good timing.

"Nadia? Are you feeling any better?"

[Aerith]

Hi.
--------

Nadia was startled out of her thoughts. Jericho was back. She hadn't been expecting him to return this soon. At least, she had expected to be asleep again by the time he did.

"Oh. Jericho." She shifted gingerly under the blanket. "I guess I'm feeling a little better. I'm not in as much pain. I'm exhausted, though."

She didn't really want to elaborate on why, unless the subject came up.

[Administrator]

Another channel is opened...lack of chatter would be appreciated.

Predis gave the mental equivalent to a nod and began to listen and study the environs. Though he was much more proficient at reading the communiques from the channels of the mind, the spider could also, to an extent, translate the gibberish of the spoken tongue that humans insisted on using into something he could understand.

Reaching his mind out, Predis connected to Nadia on a separate channel, one unconnected to the one with Jericho as of yet. "Hello, Nadia. I am Predis, the spider which you may not currently see; I am perched on Jericho's shoulder." There was not much else to be said, excepting, "I can see that you are injured. A speedy recovery would be good."

Predis only spoke facts. He did not personally 'care' if the woman recovered or not; he only knew that his master wished her to recover, and her recovery would be a beneficial thing to him. Therefore, it would, in fact, be a good thing for her to recover swiftly. If his sentence structure was slightly...strange, then it was understandable, as he was originally not able to form such coherently complex thoughts.

The spider monitored both of the channels, keeping them separate within him. He knew Jericho was not one for idle chatter, and thus did not fear that the two would speak at the same time. It was rather painful when that happened, and it was one of the main reasons he usually did not have more than a channel or two open at once. The other was that there were none to speak with.

At least, not coherently...

[Slash]

That cross...

[/center]

Poor thing. "Exhausted? Well, at least you'll get plenty of rest."

Hm. Something was off. She seemed uncomfortable, conflicted even. And what was that...? Something gleamed around her neck. It was a silver cross.

Jericho stared at it for a while before suddenly recognizing it. That was the damn thing Clive had always been carrying around. He never should have left.

Clive, you son of a bitch, if you ruined her I'm going to destroy you.[/color]

"That's Clive's. I remember seeing that. He gave it to you?"

[Aerith]

Do I have to tell you everything?
--------

When Nadia heard the spider's voice, she was greatly confused at first. First of all, the voice was actually in her head. Secondly, when she looked close enough, she could indeed see a spider sitting on Jericho's shoulder. When had he picked up a pet spider?

That wasn't important right now. Thank you, Predis. I appreciate it.

Jericho asked her about the necklace. She had known this was coming, but now that the question was here, she wasn't sure how to answer it. "Yes. He gave it to me. He also cleaned and sharpened my knives for me."

The answer was distant. She was reluctant to give any other details.

[Slash]

Clive, I swear to God I am going to stab you repeatedly.

[/center]

Damn it, damn it, damn it. Too distant. Far too distant. What had Clive said? That bastard. The damn bastard had gone and just...god damn it, how did he even go about fixing this?

"Nadia..." He looked at her for a second or two, wondering what angle to work from.

"I'm sorry, Nadia. I'm sorry for what you had to go through back in Agrabah."

It was a starting point, at least. He could get something out of that topic if he tried hard enough, and right now the goal was to get out her despair and bring her more firmly on his side by providing relief from such despair.

[Aerith]

I'm trying to forget, okay?
--------

She flinched a little at the mention of Agrabah. She would rather not remember anything that had happened there. It had happened, and there was nothing she could do about it now. Recalling the events would cause nothing but more pain.

She looked away. "It's over. Pity isn't going to change what happened." No matter how much she might want it to, it was true. Talking wouldn't erase those memories. Ever.

"I'm sorry you had to step in like that." She surprised herself with how calmly she was able to talk about it.

[Slash]

DAMN IT ALL TO THE DEEPEST PITS OF HELL.

[/center]

Had he lost her? Had he gone through all of this just to lose her? That couldn't be right. Not like this. There had to be some way to bring her back to him, some way that didn't involve cheating with Amplification.

"I did what I had to," he said. "I couldn't let them kill you."

He stopped. "Something's wrong, something besides the obvious. Why are you keeping it from me? I only want to help."

[Aerith]

This isn't what it sounds like. I don't think so, anyway.
--------

Nadia shrank deeper into the cushions and didn't meet Jericho's eyes. Funny that she should be afraid of him now, when he was not in his other, far more intimidating state.

No. She knew he wouldn't hurt her. He had saved her life on multiple occasions. It was not that she feared him harming her. She feared his disappointment. She feared doing or saying something so terrible that he would leave her.

At least, if he left her now, she would have somewhere to stay for a while.

She took a deep breath and tried to collect her thoughts. "Clive said a lot of things, and he asked to see Asherah." The ghost of a headache whispered through her head. "That's why I'm so tired."

Her eyes went back to him for a moment, then quickly looked away again. "I'm so confused. I... I enjoyed killing them. But doesn't that just... prove them right? I really am a demon, and they were right to send me away. I don't belong anywhere. Maybe... maybe Aerith shouldn't have saved me."

She grimaced, disgusted at herself. "Ugh, I sound like a thirteen-year-old."
_________________

Aerith had used the opportunity to clean herself up. Since nightfall was swiftly approaching, she went ahead and got comfortable in her pink nightgown. Her robe was strewn across her bed, ready for when she went back downstairs to sit with Nadia for the night. Conscience dictated that she could not sleep soundly in her bed while she had someone on her couch who might still be in danger of dying.

She was in the middle of brushing out her hair when she heard a soft knock at her door. Setting the brush down on her dresser, she turned to face the door and called out, "Come in."

[Nothingness]

I Don't Want to go Downstairs

Clive walked into the room, closing the door quietly behind him. The last thing he needed was Jericho breathing down his neck for what he did. Taking a quick look around, he saw a fairly nice chair in the corner of the room and sat down--he needed a breather.

"Well," he muttered, "I tried." Sliding his hands down his face, he looked at Aerith, suddenly feeling much more tired than he'd felt in a long time. Remembering the look Aerith gave him earlier, he added quickly. "I didn't exert her too much--she should be fine." He leaned his head back and closed his eyes for a moment. Clive wasn't sure if it was the emotional catharsis he just underwent or what, but he felt completely drained.

[Aerith]

Should this be making me uncomfortable?
--------

Aerith's first thought was that Clive was in her room. And he was a man. In her room. Not even Cloud had ever been in her room. She tried her hardest to keep the blush from her cheeks.

Her second thought was that Clive had left Nadia alone. "You left her down there by herself? Did she fall asleep?"

She stood up and looked toward the door, a worried expression on her face. But if she left now, she would be leaving Clive in her bedroom. And something about that didn't sit well with her.

"What did you say to her?"

[Nothingness]

I'm Not Her Babysitter

Well, he had left a little prematurely, so maybe she didn't fall asleep. Didn't he feel a little foolish. "She had been pretty tired while we talked--I don't think she could have stayed awake much longer."

What did they talk about? Well, that was a bit harder to answer clearly. Still, Clive didn't seen any reason to lie to Aerith. "I made her some tea, and we talked. She told me how she met Jericho in Twilight Town, and how he took her along with him, to which I told her how I met him. She proved the rumors wrong--her ability resembles an angel far more than a demon. Still, I regret asking her to summon it since it seemed to affect her much more than just physically. I am sorry about that."

Pausing for a moment, he took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. He could feel exhaustion kicking in. "I asked her how she felt about people. She more or less feels the same way about them as Jericho, though I think she didn't always feel that way." Instinctively, he reached for the cross, but smiled when he found that it wasn't there. They were probably laughing at him. "I told her that she had every right to hate her family and those other people for trying to kill her, but that not everyone is as cruel. I don't know why, but, as a token, I gave her my daughter's necklace. Maybe I hoped that that would be enough to prove it."

Leaning forward, he rested his elbows on his knees and pushed his palms into his eyes. "If you want to check on her, please do. Although, if Jericho is there, I don't think he'd be too pleased with me."

[Administrator]

Big concepts for a small arachnid. Actually, a large arachnid...but that is beside the point.

Predis looked at Nadia. She likely could not tell that he was looking, because he was so small, but he was regardless. "Nadia," he sent through the channel with her, "I have met the scorpions of Agrabah. They are monsters. I am a spider than can change form. I am a monster. You are human; as you might assume, I have taken much notice of humanity in my short span, and I would inform you of what I have learned."

The spider crawled to the top of Jericho's head, growing to his regular size and laying there lazily, looking down at Nadia. "In my eyes, all humans are destructive. They find a web and destroy it; our source of food which infringes upon their perfect emptiness. They kill spiders, scorpions, and others. They kill and destroy for no reason. What makes you any different than others of your kind?"

He shifted back to Jericho's channel and began speaking to the man, keeping his eyes fixed on Nadia. "Do not worry, master. I am helping you with her." There was no need to elaborate any further; both knew what was meant by the statement. The spider knew Jericho well enough, as his familiar, that he knew very near what the man was thinking, and the means which he wanted to accomplish.

Predis wanted those same means; Jericho was his master, and it was easy to tell she was important to him. He did not entirely understand why, but regardless, her importance to his master made her important to him. And that was what was important.

[Slash]

Maybe this is my chance.

[/center]

Her doubts about Aerith saving her worried him, almost hurt him. She shouldn't think like that- couldn't think like that. It would be bad to lose her because of Clive, but even worse to watch her be crushed by the descending weights of apathy and depression. "Don't say that, Nadia. Of course it's good that you're alive."

Predis spoke up, or thought up...whatever. Predis stated that he was helping, as well. Thank you.[/color]

Jericho sat down on the floor near the couch, looking at her. She avoided his gaze, and Jericho could see some fear, but it was not a fear serious enough to mean that she was afraid of him hurting her. What was it, then? Probably abandonment. She'd certainly be big on that one now.

At least now he had an angle to go on. "Does it matter what they think you are? And does it matter what you are? You're not alone, even if you don't have a home. Don't forget that."